'Some people who have experienced loss might want to talk about their baby, but others’ won’t – so it’s always best to ask' Amina Hatia, Midwifery Manager at Tommy’s
It’s really important that just because a loss was early that you understand that many women and pregnant people, as well as their partners, will feel like they’re a parent from the minute they see a line on a pregnancy test, so an early loss can be shattering because they’ll be grieving for a future they’ve imagined.Everyone handles grief differently so it’s difficult to offer advice on how to support someone after an early loss that will fit every person’s needs.
What is important is that being a kind, compassionate person is worth its weight in gold to someone who is feeling the sadness of baby loss – even when you don’t know what to say - sometimes the best thing to do is to just sit and listen. Many parents affected by loss feel alone and isolated, so your willingness to be present in some way with them really matters – more than having exactly the right thing to say.If you’ve been through an early loss yourself, they might find comfort in hearing about your experience and how you coped with it, but others might not.
Some people who have experienced loss might want to talk about their baby and use their name if they already had one in mind, but others’ won’t – so it’s always best to ask.
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