In 2021, Rachel* attended her first ever women-only sex party. Here, she shares how it revolutionised her long-term relationship and made space for her chronic conditions.
It’s 9pm on a Tuesday evening and I’m in a Zoom orientation staring at 15 or so nervous, smiling faces. No, I haven’t started a new job; this is the protocol for Skirt Club, the all-female sex party members’ club that likes to do things differently. We go around the group and introduce ourselves; there are teachers in their 30s, marketing directors in their 50s, students in their 20s, bisexuals, lesbians, bicurious newbies and mothers. Most have partners, like me.
When planning my kink scene exploits, I need to think carefully about seating and being comfortable – I’ve had to cancel countless events due to flare-ups. But I refuse to let my conditions take away this part of me. I’ve tried what I call ‘vanilla relationships’, which to me means relationships without the kinky sex parties, BDSM and the like, and while I’ve had some beautiful, healthy experiences, it just wasn’t enough.
I clicked with a thirty-something nurse, and after much chatting, we moved to the bed and kissed greedily as we slid off each other’s underwear I clicked with a thirty-something nurse, and after much chatting, we moved to the bed and kissed greedily as we slid off each other’s underwear. Then, a twenty-something woman I’d kissed earlier asked if she could join. Then another. The twosome escalated into a foursome and our writhing bodies were reflected above us as we took turns pleasuring each other with our hands, bodies and mouths. It was quite possibly the most erotic moment of my life. I’ve been back to Skirt Club 11 times since.
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